The morning after drinking alcohol I always fart my ass and stain the walls green. The walls of my lungs!
Want to have a one night stand with me? I'll fart in your face constantly. You'll wake up with my ass hovering over your head. You sick bastard. You're so nasty for smelling my farts! I'm gonna run the hose of a beer bong up my ass and rest the funnel end by your face before I pass out. I think it's the best way we can do this. I think it's a good way for us to each reach our daily goals. Bye I'm off to shit now.
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Flat 
Gas what loony bin?
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