> I don't want to be a turd in the punchbowl but the controls seem unresponsive and > really bad, to the point where I wouldn't play it more than once.
Nope, you're not that much of a turd actually. The Caanoo this is based on actually does have native analog controls, which is pretty cool if you ask me, which you didn't.
The problem is that the Caanoo runs MAME4ALL, which has absolutely NIL in terms of analog control adjustment.
Really nice execution on the part of the builder though!